The first question that my group and I put through the decision machine was "How can we provide families with autistic children a night of safe fun, in a different way than they normally are able to?" After discussion and making our way through the machine we decided that including different activities for the parents and children would provide a fun relaxing evening get away for children and parents. We decided to provide a dance and dance instruction for the parents in one room, while having toys and games in another room for the kids. However, like Brother Ward pointed out a week ago, decision making in not a one time deal, but an on going process.
I know that I have realized that our initial decision has cause the development of many more decisions. When? Where? Who? How? All of the little details are causing the group as a whole to need to make more decisions.
One important detail is where. To show how the Decision Machine works we will plug it in.
1)Construct- We are needing to know where is an appropriate and adequate place for this family event to be held.
2)Compile- The place needs to have a large room that is suitable for thirty couples as well as the dance instructors and DJ. That room also needs to be large enough that those couples can dance and have the space to learn different dances.
The facility also needs to have a couple rooms or one large room that can be "the Kids Zone" which can provide space for children of all ages to run around, play games, and also not feel too overwhelmed. If possible it would be good to have a couple rooms so that the children can be split into smaller groups to better suit the needs based on their age.
This facility should also be in a reasonably close area because we are wanting to help families in the surrounding area.
3)Collect- There is an Elementary school not too far away from the BYU campus in Provo that would have the room for both the dance instruction and the "Kids Zone"
There are facilities built to provide services directly for those with disabilities such as autism. Brighter Horizons is one such place that might be available for our specific needs.
4)Compare- Elementary school: would be free, has multiple rooms, would be able to publicize our activity to families at the school, is not in use on a Friday evening (when we would be needing it)
Brighter Horizons: is a facility built for such activities, might cost, has very close access to families with autistic children.
5)Consider- We don't really have funding to rent out a place
We might not be able to find enough volunteers to help with the "Kids Zone"
The facilities might not be available on the specific date of the activity.
6)Though more information needs to be found concerning both places and contacts need to be made, We are going to lean more towards the Elementary school because it will provide us with the necessary facility but it will also be affordable for us.
When planning a big activity such as this evening of fun for the family, we need to carefully consider different options and make sure that we have made specific decisions about the details. If we don't make decisions about details then we will end up with a poorly planned activity with many possible flaws. As the process of planning continues, so does the process of making decisions.
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
Planning SMART
I wish I could, like Calvin, be so bold as to say I have no areas that I need to change. But the truth is I have found a few things that I am in need of changing. I am going to focus on three specific goals for now.
First and foremost being my scripture study and spiritual growth patterns... I try really hard to read at least a few verses every morning before I leave for school, but I am realizing that that is not enough. Even if I am going to be going to a religion class in an hour, I need to be feasting from the scriptures and inviting the Spirit to be with me each day before I leave my apartment.
So...
S(pecific) Develop a pattern of daily scripture study within the next 30 days, so that I can learn and grow. I will wake up early enough that I will not have to rush through a few verses of scripture each morning. Being able to give myself time to read will give me opportunities to learn and grow spiritually.
M(easurable) I don't want to limit my time because I want the Spirit to teach me, but I will for sure give myself at least 15 minutes of uninterrupted scripture study.
A(ttainable) giving myself the time to read will definitely give me the opportunity to grow spiritually.
R(ealistic) 15 minutes is not too much time if I am to be committed to waking up earlier. Also I will be able to learn and grow if I am seeking the guidance of the Spirit as I study.
T(imely) It takes 30 days to form a habit and if I seek the help of the Lord I will be able to accomplish this goal.
Second: I really would like to touch at least on person's life each day.
S- I will schedule my day with flexibility so that if I find someone in need I will be able to reach out and help them without having to worry about the next thing that I have on my "to do list".
M-After serving others I know that I have helped others and can feel a difference in my attitude. The more I serve the happier I am.
A- I know that if I pray daily first thing, for the Spirit to guide me to someone in need.
R- Everyone has a need and I am surrounded by people. If I can keep the Spirit with me to tell me how and who to help then I can indeed touch others.
T- This is something I would like to continue to work on, it will help me to make room for opportunities and develop leadership skills to serve others.
Third: Although I have found ways to utilize walking time to talk to family and keep in touch, I have found that I am not as good at keeping in touch with certain friends. This is not good because it makes them feel like they don't mean as much to me.
S- I am going to work to know and understand different people's love language and then use their language to express my love for them. I will keep a little notebook of people that I meet and what their love languages are.
M- There will be pages of people in my book and then there will be more pages of different activities that I did for others.
A- Once again, I will need to diligently seek the Spirit for guidance.
R- I associate will many different people and each are trying to learn how to live on their own. I can snoop around and learn about different problems and then find how I can help.
T- These acts of love can take anywhere from 5 seconds to a couple hours, but if I schedule I will be able to transform my schedule and balance out my life.
These goals may seem simple or silly, but I know that these goals will help me become a better leader, but more importantly, a better person.
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
Working through dysfunctions
In lab we learned about the four stages of group development and also the five dysfunctions of a team.
How do these two relate? A group cannot get anything done without each individual working together, teamwork. If a group of people cannot overcome the five dysfunctions, then it won't matter how hard each individual works, they will not succeed. Instead of looking at the negative effects of not overcoming the dysfunctions, I want to discuss the positive effects when they are overcome.
Trust
When members of a team/group learn to trust others, they become willing to ask for help and become more willing to take risks.They give others in the group the benefit of the doubt and can rely on others to help get things done.
Engaging in conflict
Can bounce ideas off of each other allowing the problems to be solved quickly. Each member is able to share their ideas and then the best of each ideas can be chosen and incorporated into each activity.
Commitment
When each member is putting time and effort into the development of a project things will get done. Time restrictions will not be a major stress and things will not get procrastinated.
Accountability
Each member knows that they have a responsibility and they will feel pressure to make others in the group happy by accomplishing their task.
Results/Goals
When an achievable goal is in mind it helps the team keep on track and leads to eventual success.
Our service group is working hard to overcome these dysfunctions. As a group, we have not totally overcome all five, but as we spend time planning and discussing the project, I have found that each of us are finding ways to step over the dysfunctions and then help others understand how to work past the difficulties. Eventually we will all be able to trust each other, willingly confront conflict, become totally committed, become accountable, and to stay focused on our goals.
I have seen the results of overcoming all five together as a team when I work with the members of the Relief Society Presidency to plan meetings. Because we had been working together in a presidency and because we were set apart to our individual callings we quickly became committed to devoting our time in service. As we spent time together in planning meetings or in visiting with members of our relief society, we began to feel accountable of our individual responsibilities. As we worked together to plan activities, we all shared our ideas and then discussed the possibility of each. We were guided to decide on common goals and continually reviewed them. When working with these great sisters, I felt a love and trust grow that I have never felt before. We each came into our callings with different ideas to improve, but when we learned to work together and decided that we wanted to do everything for the sisters in our ward, we became unified and we were able to accomplish our goals.
How do these two relate? A group cannot get anything done without each individual working together, teamwork. If a group of people cannot overcome the five dysfunctions, then it won't matter how hard each individual works, they will not succeed. Instead of looking at the negative effects of not overcoming the dysfunctions, I want to discuss the positive effects when they are overcome.
Trust
When members of a team/group learn to trust others, they become willing to ask for help and become more willing to take risks.They give others in the group the benefit of the doubt and can rely on others to help get things done.
Engaging in conflict
Can bounce ideas off of each other allowing the problems to be solved quickly. Each member is able to share their ideas and then the best of each ideas can be chosen and incorporated into each activity.
Commitment
When each member is putting time and effort into the development of a project things will get done. Time restrictions will not be a major stress and things will not get procrastinated.
Accountability
Each member knows that they have a responsibility and they will feel pressure to make others in the group happy by accomplishing their task.
Results/Goals
When an achievable goal is in mind it helps the team keep on track and leads to eventual success.
Our service group is working hard to overcome these dysfunctions. As a group, we have not totally overcome all five, but as we spend time planning and discussing the project, I have found that each of us are finding ways to step over the dysfunctions and then help others understand how to work past the difficulties. Eventually we will all be able to trust each other, willingly confront conflict, become totally committed, become accountable, and to stay focused on our goals.
I have seen the results of overcoming all five together as a team when I work with the members of the Relief Society Presidency to plan meetings. Because we had been working together in a presidency and because we were set apart to our individual callings we quickly became committed to devoting our time in service. As we spent time together in planning meetings or in visiting with members of our relief society, we began to feel accountable of our individual responsibilities. As we worked together to plan activities, we all shared our ideas and then discussed the possibility of each. We were guided to decide on common goals and continually reviewed them. When working with these great sisters, I felt a love and trust grow that I have never felt before. We each came into our callings with different ideas to improve, but when we learned to work together and decided that we wanted to do everything for the sisters in our ward, we became unified and we were able to accomplish our goals.
Monday, October 3, 2011
Conflicting Conflicts
Side note: My highest score was actually accommodating, but there weren't any questions for that particular type so I just used my second highest type.
Why compromise?
Compromise is a way to deal with issues temporarily or within a time limit. However, it is sometimes the only way that people use to deal with their conflicts. This can cause some problems because it might cause some to feel like their leader lacks the power to lead in decision making. Sometimes it is just the way that the leader chooses to "keep the peace" among those involved.
I only have a personal critic of myself, but I feel that I don't focus too heavily on compromise that I forget my values. Though compromise is good, I have made decisions early in my life about not making compromises my standards and my values for others. It sometimes makes conflicts harder when it is a issue of values and standards because I know that I cannot lower mine to meet somewhere in the middle for other people. I make it a priority when entering a conflict to know before hand how my standards are going to effect the decision making process. In these situations, I feel that compromise doesn't show weakness or a lack of trust as some might think, but it shows strength and integrity; two very important qualities of leaders.
Collaborating...my supposed weakness. So why is it so hard? I would agree that sometimes it is hard to see a joint gain or a win win situation when solving conflicts. However,it does not mean that I see it as impossible. Collaborating is the best way to solve a problem if all are willing to give their input and then work through all the ideas to come up with the best. This sounds really easy, but there is a level of trust that needs to be met among all parties involved and that is when it gets hard. Setting up trust is hard, but it is the first step in collaborating, so it's important.
So how am I going to conflict my conflicts? Normally when a conflict arises I dread it. My body responds with a same dread: my hands become clammy, my stomach begins to churn, my heart pounds, and my face flushes bright red. Thoughts rush through my head: "I wish I could disappear," "I really don't want to do this," "If I just agree with them then it can be over." These aren't necessarily bad thoughts or bad reactions, but they won't get me what I want out of a situation. As a leader, I cannot constantly sit back and let others make the decisions because I wouldn't be fulfilling my duty. Therefore, I need to change my habits. 1. I will take a deep breath to clear my mind and give me added courage. 2. I will reassure myself that my opinion is just as important as everyone else's opinion. 3. I will introduce my own concerns and ask for the concerns of others as well. 4. I will make sure everyone, including myself, has expressed their concerns and also their suggestions. 5. I will then attempt to lead the group in discussing and collaborating together to find a mutual solution.
Why compromise?
Compromise is a way to deal with issues temporarily or within a time limit. However, it is sometimes the only way that people use to deal with their conflicts. This can cause some problems because it might cause some to feel like their leader lacks the power to lead in decision making. Sometimes it is just the way that the leader chooses to "keep the peace" among those involved.
I only have a personal critic of myself, but I feel that I don't focus too heavily on compromise that I forget my values. Though compromise is good, I have made decisions early in my life about not making compromises my standards and my values for others. It sometimes makes conflicts harder when it is a issue of values and standards because I know that I cannot lower mine to meet somewhere in the middle for other people. I make it a priority when entering a conflict to know before hand how my standards are going to effect the decision making process. In these situations, I feel that compromise doesn't show weakness or a lack of trust as some might think, but it shows strength and integrity; two very important qualities of leaders.
Collaborating...my supposed weakness. So why is it so hard? I would agree that sometimes it is hard to see a joint gain or a win win situation when solving conflicts. However,it does not mean that I see it as impossible. Collaborating is the best way to solve a problem if all are willing to give their input and then work through all the ideas to come up with the best. This sounds really easy, but there is a level of trust that needs to be met among all parties involved and that is when it gets hard. Setting up trust is hard, but it is the first step in collaborating, so it's important.
So how am I going to conflict my conflicts? Normally when a conflict arises I dread it. My body responds with a same dread: my hands become clammy, my stomach begins to churn, my heart pounds, and my face flushes bright red. Thoughts rush through my head: "I wish I could disappear," "I really don't want to do this," "If I just agree with them then it can be over." These aren't necessarily bad thoughts or bad reactions, but they won't get me what I want out of a situation. As a leader, I cannot constantly sit back and let others make the decisions because I wouldn't be fulfilling my duty. Therefore, I need to change my habits. 1. I will take a deep breath to clear my mind and give me added courage. 2. I will reassure myself that my opinion is just as important as everyone else's opinion. 3. I will introduce my own concerns and ask for the concerns of others as well. 4. I will make sure everyone, including myself, has expressed their concerns and also their suggestions. 5. I will then attempt to lead the group in discussing and collaborating together to find a mutual solution.
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